The 'shoe' mantra

So, there has been a lot of show throwing off late! For one it was Bush and then our very own P. Chidambaram. I stand witness to the fact that the ‘shoe’ off late had become so important that some one hour or maybe two at my institution went discussing it. My classmate argued and argued upon the emotion that shoe has become a symbol of suppressed agony which is finally finding a way out. Well, I think, if this is what it is, there would be soon a good demand for shoes. Now, we all know that in and across cultures the throwing of shoe is seen as an act of doing an insult and am not going to bore you with all that history of the shoe-be it Bata or Lakhani but would highlight some quirky thoughts which my mind could just not do away with.

• In some years, when the journalists would enter a press conference they would be asked to open their shoes outside. Because they wouldn’t want a room full of stinking socks, even the socks…

• If you are planning to throw shoes at some dignitary, take care to carry along another pair. It doesn’t look good that you walk out with a bare foot. Izzat ka sawaal he bhai!

• Look out for a show which is old and useless. This would also give you a reason to buy another pair in its place (supposing you are one kanjoos)

• But if you’re concerned about your reputation, make sure the shoe is a quality one. The least you can do is polish it before the throw.

• If your wife has been pissing you off late, take her latest and most expensive pair to throw. If she gets back to you with all her other pairs, don’t blame me:\

• Keep a good stock of shoes. You never know when they would run out. (demand is always more than supply in such situations, you see)

• Remember, it’s more about missing your target than hitting it.

• If you’re not the kind who would throw shoes at anybody, just wait and watch. Yes, who knows you can make a collection from the collected shoes and put them on some exhibition. Modern art ka naam nahi suna?

Well, that’s it for now. Time to get ‘shoe-d’ before you ‘shoo’ me away…

Hail thy shoe!