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these will make you smile

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it
seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an
hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S
relativity.

- Albert Einstein



The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working
the moment you get up in the morning and does not
stop until you get into the office.

- Robert Frost



The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's
there to appreciate it.

- Franklin P. Jones


We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain
the success of those we don't like?

- Jean Cocturan


It matters not whether you win or lose; what
matters is whether I win or lose.

- Darrin Weinberg



Life is pleasant.
Death is peaceful.
It's the transition that's troublesome.



Help a man when he is in trouble and he will
remember you when he is
in trouble again.


Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers.



It is not exactly cheating, I prefer to consider it creative problem solving.



Whoever said money can't buy happiness, didn't know
where to shop.



Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but then again,
neither does milk.


Most people are only alive because it is illegal to
shoot them.


Forgive your enemies but remember their names.


The number of people watching you is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your action.



Don't worry that the world ends today, it's already
tomorrow in Australia!

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